a story about:

Today, I came to a gathering event about “be an inspiring teenagers”. Many people become  speakers there and my idol, which is Mr. Andreas Chang, was also one of them. Why I adore him so much because I can guarantee that I must have something new after I met him. I always have something to think about my life, about this life, and he always encourage me and say that I’m worthy. He is great because he was trying to be great, and he is humble as we can imagine. Also today, he said quote after questioning about 10 things we have in life, and what 3 things that we want to share to people.   The quote is:                                                  Because, people will disappear and objects might be lost. And I agreed so hard as ...

I can drive and ride. So, for this little thing you can compare me with ordinary girl out there. Yea, Im that arrogant and that counted.  I can cook. Actually, my category of cooking is knowing where is pepper and onion and chili and salt and sugar, knowing how to turn on the stove. So, yea I can cook.  I learn a lot. I learn about you, I learn about my family and your family and my friend and your friend. I learn to be better person, I learn about what you like and Im upgrading my self of knowledges about you.  I read. To love someone who reads is a must. So, no reason needed.  I write. To love someone who writes is a plus. So, yay you for getting a plus!  I listen. You can guarantee me to always listen over your bullshits or your stories. I listen to everything. I speak up. You can always know everything about me from my mouth. You don't have to be good at guessing because i will tell you everything you need to know and you need to do....

I worry about my grades I worry about my expensive dream I worry about if I accepted as exchange student and have to live alone abroad I worry about my grade this semester I worry about in my late 18 I didn’t make anything in my life I worry about my targets wouldn’t on time I worry about my body that would always be this fat or more I worry about my job after graduated I worry about my family, my parent’s health I worry about my family financial condition I worry about my health I worry about this July I couldn’t make any draft at all I worry about my blog I worry about anything that I did wouldn’t affecting anyone I worry about being fail because I didn’t work hard for it I worry about being fail because I’m not good enough I worry about my mental that will easily get tired and not willing to try again I worry about that I would give up on life and feeling done. ...

I lost interest in people, I just imagine if everybody would do the same as me. Whats on my mind right now is “if you like me, its good. If you don’t then its okay.” Because, my life right now is already very cruel and why should I busy my day for caring about other people. Another idea comes with big issues such as atheist, vulgar relationship, vulgar outfit, being gay or bi or transgender, how she gets money, how he can be that romantic. For me, you can be the F you want, as long… As long you don’t touch me, you don’t touch my friends, you don’t talk about my life, my family, or being sotoy of what I have been through. I lost interest about people. The way they send good comments, they way they greet me, the way they touch my top and say “bagus deh bajunya”/”lucu sepatunya”, they way they show how they follow me on instagram or path or twitter or blogger and say “lo gendutan gak sih dari waktu di Instagram?”. I don’t trust them anymore, I don’t trust there is one single du...