a story about:

I love the way you ask questions I love the way you want to know about my life, about my day, about my dreams. I love how you answer my questions. Your glimpse, your eyes' sparks. please stay a little longer. I know it wont work out. I know we wont work out. but please, stay little bit longer.

Tidakkah kau ingat, Bahwa aku bukan burung itu lagi. Burung yang membawa kabar untukmu   Burung yang bisa kau panggil pulang Bahkan kau terbangkan sesuka hatimu Tidakkah kau sadar, Bahwa aku bukan burung itu lagi Burung yang merekahkan sayapnya di hadapanmu Burung yang indah dan menari Burung yang bahagia dan kembali. Sadarlah, Aku hanya burung yang pergi.

Lille, Jan 23rd 2016 07.11 am in -4 Dc  Im on my train going to Charles de Gaulle Airport, writing while crying. Shares hug with Tante because she took me to Lille Europe. Maybe would be the last time being here again in a moment.  I really never know where this life would take me to. After all the dreams that I made and this journey that I have done. I really have no idea.  I wouldn't be fully home again because I leave my heart to the people I left here, they said. But I wouldn't regret anything.  Tante asked me whether I regret anything of my staying and the only answer is 'how can I?'  I chose this journey at the first place.  I really want to stop whining about how sad I am. Bu Im too sad to stop.  I never wanted to be away so far, maybe because I don't want to have another goodbyes. I don't want to leave 'for good' as people said.  I should be really awake to understand that I would have 'see you again' after 'hah